Curious search engine terms

Doctor Who series finale

Yesterday I had an unexpected visitor. That is not to say that I was displeased to “see” them, but it did wet my curiosity. More so when I realised how they found me out. Unknown X typed “moffat briggs” in the search engine and were delivered to Shards of Silence.

For a moment or two I continued under the delusion that I was the “briggs” they were looking for. There are several writers I would love to work with, and Moffat is certainly one of them, so being paired up with the creator of two of my favourite British shows put a smile on my face. But the chances of that are so infinitely small that I decided to go out on a limb and do some research on this.

To discover “the other” Briggs, I had to delve a little deeper in Doctor Who history. I came across an interview with Steven Moffat, where he claimed that The Big Bang was the best Doctor Who story he has ever written:

“The Doctor is trapped inside a prison from which even he can’t escape. Amy Pond is dead. Rory is plastic. River Song has been blown up in the Tardis, which has been blown up and destroyed every sun in the universe. I think any other hero would be in a pickle but I think The Doctor can take it. I really do think episode 13, the episode we’ll see on Saturday, is a story only Doctor Who can do – no other show could have come close to a story like this. That’s what is exciting about it.” Skyfilove

The other interviewee however was the one I was searching for: the mysterious Briggs who unintentionally prompted the visit in the first place.

It didn’t take me long to track them down. He is none other than Nicholas Briggs, the terrifying voice that seeps into Whovian dreams everywhere in the guise of Cybermen and Daleks. The Doctor’s deadliest foes and my namesake are one.

And here he is infiltrating Tardis territory. Mystery solved.

I hope that the accidental guest found at least something on Shards of Silence to make up for their troubles. Perhaps I ought to have a word with the editorial team and see when the next issue of The Gallifrey Express will make an appearance.


[Loud bangs somewhere in the background.]

Wait a moment. There’s someone at the door.

“Hey! Stop that racket. I’m busy!”

[A massive explosion and the entrance hall now has a view of the street curtesy of…]

Cybermen: “You will be upgraded. You will become like us.”


There is a time for bravery and then there is a time to leg it. Umm. Second solution to be implemented at once! Just as I thought I reached safety via the back exit…

Daleks: “Exterminate-Exterminate”

Well… now I’m in a bit of a…

14 thoughts on “Curious search engine terms

  1. Were you on the first page of the search? That would be helpful haha.

    Occasionally someone googles something weird and finds me on page 52. Haha…

      • Kindly read my latest DM on Twitter to you as quickly as possible.

        Will discuss with you in detail by email or Twitter DM if you would like additional detail.

        See my TL discussion with the person for additional background information.

      • [Crinkled radio noises. Chhhrrhh Chhhhrhh] Krew-Krew-Krew. This is 009-009-009. Over. Wow – that’s a lot to catch up on. Will see what I can do. Massage received. Over. 😉

    • I found out a few other somewhat disconcerting things about how they work of late. I am glad that this time it wasn’t a disturbing one: I’ve had a few of those in the past.

  2. It’s interesting trying to maintain a zero footprint on Google, if you Google my real name other people come up, that’s kind of creepy in a way.

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