The dog ate my post

Inspired by Anonymous, created by Vic Briggs

“Are you sure you want to do this?”

Having just pressed the ‘save draft’ button on a post I’ve been working on for quite a while, I was certain that I did want to “do this” i.e. save my post. So when WordPress asked me the question, I didn’t waiver. There were no alarm bells going off in the recesses of my exhausted brain. What could possibly go wrong? I hit ‘yes’ certain of the outcome. Except…

Instead of saving my post, WordPress deleted it.

Brilliant.

Clearly our blogging platform did not deem my lovingly crafted post worthy of seeing the light of day. Or night. It is forevermore lost in the virtual cemetery of other posts that have met a similar fate. I can only hope it receives a good welcome, wherever it may be. Doubtful. Very doubtful. I didn’t get the chance to teach it how to survive in the wild. Worse still, it may think that I abandoned it on purpose and with no one to reassure it of the opposite, it may loose heart and give up altogether. Is it too late to give it a fighting chance I wonder?

Dear post,

I am so sorry to have lost you. We had a good run, you and I. It is such a pity that our time together was cut short. You didn’t deserve that and I will do my utmost to put things right. While I figure out how to go about it, here are a few tips on how to survive in the blogging wilderness. I’m coming for you. Just you wait.

1. Don’t waste your energy trying to make it back to civilisation. Chances are you’ll take a wrong turn and then it will┬ábe impossible to track you down.

2. Wrap yourself up in something warm and find appropriate shelter. Failing that, build one. I’m told that lean-tos are your best option. I know you are afraid of spiders, but they won’t bite (unless you’ve made it to Australia in which case you’ll have to play it by ear).

3. Since there is no chance of me finding you tonight, you’ll have to improvise a bog-bed (it’s England, you know so it is bound to rain, although you’re better off with one even if you’re lost elsewhere).

4. Now may be a good idea to delve into that pocketful of treats you kept sneaking from my fridge and I hope you didn’t throw away your water bottle. If you’re out of both, do not despair. You can survive three days without water and three weeks without food. Let’s just hope it won’t come to that.

5. Make a fire, keep warm and wait for the rescue team to reach you.

I’m on my way!

And breathe. Relax and don’t forget to breathe. You won’t survive for long without air. Mind though, you are a blogpost… so what do I know?

 

Daily Post: The Wanderer